*Shakes Head, Moves On*

I have recently posted a few things that required trips to the ED, and a few others that probably should have included a trip to the ED…

There are a few others too – like when they had to rush me to the ED from work because I couldn’t breathe due to chest pain.  Not a good feeling, especially since I have a heart condition. That ended with a diagnosis of pleurisy.  Or when I was walking – just walking – and my ankle rolled and swelled to the size of a cantaloupe. Until my friend witnessed that event with her own eyes, I think she thought I was doing these things to myself for attention.

Needless to say, with every event, my boss would just walk in to the office, look at me, get the low-down, shake his head, and walk on.  At one point he made the comment “you know, if it were anyone else, I wouldn’t believe them, but somehow, with you, I do.”

I think historically, if things like this happened to someone, they’d be using it as an excuse to cut out of work, but eh, not me.  I think because of that, he trusted that I was a loyal employee, a weird one, but loyal none-the-less.  I am like a loveable entertaining accident.  From his perspective, none of it was able to be turned on under workman’s comp too ~ so he didn’t need to worry!

These things are part of who I am and even though there was a great deal of pain associated with the event, the stories are quite often entertaining to relay, at least.  SO, they happen and I move on.

I think part of why I embrace the nonsense that infiltrates my life is due, in part, to something my homeroom teacher told me in 7th & 8th grade.  We were playing kickball and I Charlie Browned it.  I TOTALLY bit it.  There I am, flat on my back in front of all my classmates.  I busted out laughing.  She told me something to the effect that she was so proud that I was confident enough to laugh that off, many wouldn’t.  Who knew?

The only problem with having so many ED visits in a short time  ~ and switching EDs to boot, I was put on a “list.”

On my last trip to the ED I had a social worker come in my room.  I didn’t realize who she was or why she was there at first. (BAD PATIENT SAT! ALWAYS INTRODUCE YOURSELF! COMMUNICATE COMMUNICATE COMMUNICATE!).

Social Worker: So, you are single right?

Me: yep

Social Worker: No boyfriend?

Me: nope

Social Worker: Roommate?

Me: Nope.  No. And thanks for making me feel like a dateless loser.  Want to discuss my weight now too?  How about my dead grandfather?

Social Worker: uh…

Me: Wait…I know why you are here!!  Oh, no.  I think my house is just possessed.  Either that, or there is black mold in the house. No one is abusing me.

She told me she was required to ask me a few other questions “just to make sure.” I think she was really glad to be out of there. I don’t think she knew how to take my sense of humor. Must be a tough job walking into those rooms ~ not knowing what may result from it.  At least the case was closed on me.